Fragile

Late last night, I watched my beautiful daughter sleep. She is flawless--a true work of art from the Creator of the Universe. How did He know that what I most wanted in all the world was this little girl? I tell my mother all the time that I still marvel at the fact that this child is really mine -- but she is. And, oh, how I'd go to the ends of the earth for her. She is the love of my life. She made me what I always wanted to be....her mommy.

For some, motherhood comes easily into their lives. Almost like something you don't even know you want until it is thrust, screaming and pooping, into your arms. For others of us, it is a hard-won battle and can make you especially leery of every possible danger or threat -- always fearing that your happiness is soon to be snatched away and your dream destroyed. Neither side is an easy one to be on...to be unready or to be so overly prepared that you drive yourself and everyone around you insane. But, in the end, mothers we are.

I can't help but think about another mom today. A mother who has lost her precious babies in the cruelest of ways. I do not know this woman, but know some of her family...and I know that they are in indescribable pain. Prayers roll through my head constantly..."Lord, give them peace", "Dear God, comfort this family"...all the while knowing that comfort and peace will be hard to find in the coming days. It is simply not fair to lose a child. It's not the way life is supposed to go. We are supposed to get to hold them, kiss them, and teach them while we watch them go into the world on their own. We are supposed to be able to know what they are like as adults and burst with pride for their accomplishments all along the way. When this most sacred thing is torn from your life, you think you'll never breathe again.

But, you do. You have to. Somehow, someway, God helps us start to heal, slowly, slowly. It's not easy, and so immensely unfair. And while she, and so many of us will never be the same after our little ones leave this world...we can know that they are our angels-- just like we always thought they were.